I guess Santa Claus is now in his cleaning up and putting away tools stage of his working year before the biggest job of all, the delivery. It's funny that he trusts the Elves to help with the present production but not with delivery, maybe they don't work well unsupervised?
On the subject of Elves I think Santa might want to tweak his human resources policy to get the most out of his workforce. Most of the Elves I've seen are tiny except in the Lord of the Rings where they are tall but seem more interested in platting their hair than any hard graft in a toy factory.
I propose each Elf be paired with a Dwarf in a buddy system. Dwarves are historically hard workers, they often sing whilst working which is great for morale. Any piece of toy or tool that a Elf can't handle a Dwarf certainly can, leaving the Elves nibble fingers to contend with any electrical circuitry etc. Dwarf will also keep a tricky Elf in line, if they think they are going to sneak off the job while a Dwarf is around they better get ready for a shock!
I'm not saying Santa isn't doing a great job, I'm just trying to give something back in a proactive way. When the big guys comes calling Christmas Eve I'll have more than a cookie and milk waiting, I'll have this letter full of good advice and that's the gift that keeps giving the whole year through.
Illustration by Bruce Lugli.
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